Bite the Apple

madziontist: yayponies: It’s a time-honored tradition at Navy...

Wed, 21 Dec 2011 20:36:59 -0500

yayponies:

It’s a time-honored tradition at Navy homecomings – one lucky sailor is chosen to be first off the ship for the long-awaited kiss with a loved one.
Today, for the first time, the happily reunited couple was gay.

The dock landing ship Oak Hill has been gone for nearly three months, training with military allies in Central America.

As the homecoming drew near, the crew and ship’s family readiness group sold $1 raffle tickets for the first kiss. Petty Officer 2nd Class Marissa Gaeta bought 50 - which is actually fewer than many people buy, she said, so she was surprised Monday to find out she’d won.

Her girlfriend of two years, Petty Officer 3rd Class Citlalic Snell, was waiting when she crossed the brow.

They kissed. The crowd cheered. And with that, another vestige of the policy that forced gays to serve in secrecy vanished.

By Corinne Reilly
The Virginian-Pilot
© December 21, 2011

squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

News: Being fat = Worse than foster care!

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 19:14:35 -0500

I don’t know if I’m late to this party, but the Tumblrverse needs a load of this one: a child was recently removed from his home, taken from his mother, and put into foster care because of his “severe obesity.” Cuyahoga County (where Cleveland, Ohio is) decided to remove the child because his mother “wasn’t doing enough to control his weight.” This is despite her having another child who is skinny—apparently, feeding two people in the same way and getting two different weight results does not prove anything. Furthermore, when the first foster mother was unable to fulfill the diet and exercise requirements required by the county, they moved the child to another home with a personal trainer. The whirlwind of unreasonable things going on in this case is overwhelming. The mother was successful with temporary weight loss, but her son gained it back, just like, you know, 95% of dieters who AREN’T kids with siblings who sneak them cookies. The mother was clearly not stuffing her child full of cheese curls and donuts, but since the medical community knows that constant willful eating of junk food is the only possible way in the entire universe to be overweight, and that there are no other factors whatsoever within the realm of possibility in this or any other dimension that could contribute to obesity, well, obviously this was an abusive neglectful parent. I am consumed with hyperbolic outrage.

The child himself was an honor roll student—gee, I wonder how long that will last now that he’s separated from his family and in foster care?

http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2011/11/obese_cleveland_heights_child.html

iddevlin: iamateenagefeminist: iamabutchsolo: This is...

Sat, 10 Dec 2011 22:22:46 -0500

iddevlin:

iamateenagefeminist:

iamabutchsolo:

This is actually so legit.

It’s so stupid how people actually think that a woman’s period would make her completely irrational so that she cannot be in a position of power.

Tina Fey and ~~Amy Poehlr~~ Jane Krakowski are so good at funny feminist commentary.

~*~Girl Crushes~*~

LOL I love these.

Hello, I Am Fat

Sat, 10 Dec 2011 21:38:47 -0500

Hello, I Am Fat:

captainporkerella:

mrrowl:

This is my body (over there—see it?). I have lived in this body my whole life. I have wanted to change this body my whole life. I have never wanted anything as much as I have wanted a new body. I am aware every day that other people find my body disgusting. I always thought that some day—when I finally stop failing—I will become smaller, and when I become smaller literally everything will get better (I’ve heard It Gets Better)! My life can begin! I will get the clothes that I want, the job that I want, the love that I want. It will be great! Think how great it will be to buy some pants or whatever at J. Crew. Oh, man. Pants. Instead, my body stays the same.

There is not a fat person on earth who hasn’t lived this way. Clearly this is a TERRIBLE WAY TO EXIST. Also, strangely enough, it did not cause me to become thin. So I do not believe any of it anymore, because fuck it very much.

This is my body. It is MINE. I am not ashamed of it in any way. In fact, I love everything about it. Men find it attractive. Clothes look awesome on it. My brain rides around in it all day and comes up with funny jokes. Also, I don’t have to justify its awesomeness/attractiveness/healthiness/usefulness to anyone, because it is MINE. Not yours.

I’m not going to spend a bunch of time blogging about fat acceptance here (but please read this), because other writers have already done it much more eloquently, thoroughly, and radically than I ever could. But I do feel obligated to try to explain what this all means.

You asked me for links, Dan, so here are some links for you. There are plenty more, but if you want me to go through each one and explain to you how these words and implications hurt and shame people, you’re going to have to pay me overtime (in Doritos!!!!!). I get that you think you’re actually helping people and society by contributing to the fucking Alp of shame that crushes every fat person every day of their lives—the same shame that makes it a radical act for me to post a picture of my body and tell you how much it weighs. But you’re not helping. Shame doesn’t work. Diets don’t work. Shame is a tool of oppression, not change.

Fat people already are ashamed. It’s taken care of. No further manpower needed on the shame front, thx. I am not concerned with whether or not fat people can change their bodies through self-discipline and “choices.” Pretty much all of them have tried already. A couple of them have succeeded. Whatever. My question is, what if they try and try and try and still fail? What if they are still fat? What if they are fat forever? What do you do with them then? Do you really want millions of teenage girls to feel like they’re trapped in unsightly lard prisons that are ruining their lives, and on top of that it’s because of their own moral failure, and on top of that they are ruining America with the terribly expensive diabetes that they don’t even have yet? You know what’s shameful? A complete lack of empathy.

And if you really claim to still be confused—”Nu uh! I never said anything u guyz srsly!”—there can be no misunderstanding shit like this:

I am thoroughly annoyed at having my tame statements of fact—being heavy is a health risk; rolls of exposed flesh are unsightly—characterized as “hate speech.”

Ha!

1. “Rolls of exposed flesh are unsightly” is in no way a “tame statement of fact.” It is not a fact at all—it is an incredibly cruel, subjective opinion that reinforces destructive, paternalistic, oppressive beauty ideals. I am not unsightly. No one deserves to be told that they’re unsightly. But this is what’s behind this entire thing—it’s not about “health,” it’s about “eeeewwwww.” You think fat people are icky. Eeeewww, a fat person might touch you on a plane. With their fat! Eeeeewww! Coincidentally, that’s the same feeling that drives anti-gay bigots, no matter what excuses they drum up about “family values” and, yes, “health.” It’s all “eeeewwwww.” And sorry, I reject your eeeeeewwww.

2. You are not concerned about my health. Because if you were concerned about my health, you would also be concerned about mymental health, which has spent the past 28 years being slowly eroded by statements like the above. Also, you don’t know anything about my health. You do happen to be the boss of me, but you are not the doctor of me. You have no idea what I eat, how much I exercise, what my blood pressure is, or whether or not I’m going to get diabetes. Not that any of that matters, because it is entirely none of your business.

3. “But but but my insurance premiums!!!” Bullshit. You live in a society with other people. I don’t have kids, but I pay taxes that fund schools. The idea that we can somehow escape affecting each other is deeply conservative. Barbarous, even. Is that really what you’re going for? Good old-fashioned American individualism? Please.

4. But most importantly: I reject this entire framework. I don’t give a shit what causes anyone’s fatness. It’s irrelevant and it’s none of my business. I am not making excuses, because I have nothing to excuse. I reject the notion that thinness is the goal, that thin = better—that I am an unfinished thing and that my life can really start when I lose weight. That then I will be a real person and have finally succeeded as a woman. I am not going to waste another second of my life thinking about this. I don’t want to have another fucking conversation with another fucking woman about what she’s eating or not eating or regrets eating or pretends to not regret eating to mask the regret. OOPS I JUST YAWNED TO DEATH.

If you really want change to happen, if you really want to “help” fat people, you need to understand that shaming an already-shamed population is, well, shameful. Do you know what happened as soon as I rejected all this shit and fell in unconditional luuuuurve with my entire body? I started losing weight. Immediately. WELL LA DEE FUCKING DA.

saw this elsewhere. shluv <3

moonbeamsmysummerlove: sleepydumpling: bilt2tumble: sourceduma...

Thu, 18 Aug 2011 22:28:52 -0400

moonbeamsmysummerlove:

sleepydumpling:

bilt2tumble:

sourcedumal:

Okay, I just want to say something, because a lot of people are reblogging this like a joke. As a person who has had an eating disorder while fat, I can GUARANTEE you that people treat you differently than a skinny person with an eating disorder. People encouraged me to keep going with my disordered behaviors, because they saw it as “such a good thing” that I was “losing all that bad weight.” This included doctors who sent me on my way despite my grandmother getting in their asses. I went through 4 doctors before whittling myself down. Many of my concerns were ignored despite having CLEAR signs of an eating disorder, because in reality, we don’t give a fuck about how fat people lose weight, as long as they lose it and stop being visible.

But that’s just concern for your health! Even if it fucks you up or kills you.
/sarc

What’s truly amazing to me is how SO many people continually try to pour sparkles on the utter bullshit of their ‘concern’ or pin rainbows all over it. Then they try to convince you it’s sincere / doesn’t stink.

Trigger warning for frank description of disordered behaviours.

As another fat person who is in recovery from an eating disorder, I can attest to this. I was well practiced in starvation, purging and laxative/other substance abuse for over 20 years with my eating disorder, yet no matter what I did or said to most health care professionals, not to mention anyone else in my life, it was assumed I was a binge eater or an over-eater, simply because I am very fat.

In fact, several doctors told me it would “do me good” to restrict more, or simply encouraged my disordered behaviour no matter what damage it was doing to my body (my teeth are fucked from puking, I have IBS from all the laxatives and diet pills and my metabolism is completely screwed) and my health along the way.

Reblogging for commentary. EDs are only tragic when they occur in thin people.

Yep. I don’t even bother to tell doctors anymore. And I worry so much about my teeth…

melasaurus: getstooobsessed: “Mommy, they are just like me.” ...

Thu, 18 Aug 2011 22:26:20 -0400

melasaurus:

getstooobsessed:

“Mommy, they are just like me.”

My oldest son is six years old and in love for the first time. He is in love with Blaine from Glee.

For those who don’t know Blaine is a boy…a gay boy, the boyfriend of one of the main characters, Kurt.

This isn’t a ‘he thinks Blaine is really cool’ kind of love. It is a mooning at a picture of Blaine’s face for a half hour followed by a wistful “He’s so pretty” kind of love.

He loves the episode where two boys kiss. My son will call people in from other parts of the house to make sure they don’t miss his ‘favorite part.’ He’s been known to rewind it and watch it over again…and force other to, as well, if he doesn’t think people have been paying enough attention.

This infatuation doesn’t bother me or his father. We live in a very hip-liberal neighborhood, many of our friends are gay, and idea of having a gay son isn’t something that bothers either of us. Our son is going to be who he is, and it is our job to love him. End of story.

He is also six. Six year olds get obsessed with all kinds of things. This might not mean anything at all. We always joke that he’s either gay, or we have the best blackmail material in the history of mankind when he’s a 16 year old straight boy. (Take that naked bath time pictures!)

Then the other day we were traveling across the state listening to the Warblers album (of course), and in the middle of Candles, my son pipes up from the back seat.

“Mommy, Kurt and Blaine are boyfriends.”

“Yes, they are,” I affirm.

“They don’t like kissing girls. They just kiss boys.”

“That’s true.”

“Mommy, they are just like me.”

“That’s great, baby. You know I love you no matter what?”

“I know…” I could hear him rolling his eyes at me.

When we got home I recapped this conversation to his Dad, and we stood simply looking into each other’s eyes for a moment. Then we smiled.

“So if at 16 he wants to make a big announcement at the dinner table, we can say ‘You told us when you were six. Pass the carrots’ and he’ll be disappointed we stole his big dramatic moment,” my husband says with a laugh and hugs me.

Only time will tell if my son is gay, but if he is I am glad he’s mine. I am glad he has been born into our family. A family full of people who will love and accept him. People who will never want him to change. With parents who will look forward to dancing at his wedding.

And I have to admit, Blaine would be a really cute son-in-law.

Actually shed a tear.

WANT.

Thu, 18 Aug 2011 22:10:14 -0400

WANT.

fatpositivemanatee: sun-shine-baby: fpmanatee loves paula deen,...

Tue, 02 Aug 2011 19:17:05 -0400

fatpositivemanatee:

sun-shine-baby:

fpmanatee loves paula deen, and butter

Acceptance for all! Except, you know, fat people.

Thu, 21 Jul 2011 23:06:27 -0400

Acceptance for all! Except, you know, fat people. :

Apparently, Lady Gaga’s fans got their noses bent out of joint when Adele took more VMA nominations. So, they did the mature, unprejudiced thing and made fun of Adele’s weight on Twitter.

Oh, wait, I forgot, making fun of fat people isn’t bias!

I hope that Lady Gaga comes out and tells her fans that this is crap. I do admire what she’s done in the gay community; she needs to put her fans in their place.

"It was true that I didn’t have much ambition, but there ought to be a place for people without..."

Tue, 19 Jul 2011 22:18:02 -0400

“It was true that I didn’t have much ambition, but there ought to be a place for people without ambition, I mean a better place than the one usually reserved. How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get to a place where essentially you made lots of money for somebody else and were asked to be grateful for the opportunity to do so?”

- Charles Bukowski (via rainier)

Photo

Tue, 19 Jul 2011 00:39:50 -0400

Haterade: Now in both fat-free and extra sugar! A treatise on size

Mon, 11 Jul 2011 01:38:10 -0400

Part One. More parts to follow (someday).

As a person who is both eating disordered (God, that sounds so pretentious) and overweight, I have a lot to think on the size/size acceptance debate. There are a lot of varieties of size acceptance and non-acceptance, and some different reasons behind them. So here’s my “if I ruled the world” opinion:

1. It’s never okay to hate on anyone for their body size/type, or for their bodily decisions in general.

This should go without saying. Sure, there can be plenty of arguments on how obese people raise health care costs, just the same as people who smoke (which I also do; I know—hush), people who do drugs, heavy drinkers, promiscuous types, serious and/or professional athletes (the hell you say! No, really, it’s true, sports can cause injuries), people who break the speed limit, and skinny mofos with bird metabolisms who end up with jacked-up cholesterol because they can, and do, eat daily bacon cheeseburgers without a change in appearance.

Basically, health care costs are driven up by human fallibility. Many people pose the obesity argument as though our hospitals contain only two wards: fat people and saint-like cancer patients. It’s not true. A good portion of medicine is devoted to the wide variety of things that people do to themselves, because we are all human. Really, unless you’re a nun/monk or yogi, you probably don’t have room to comment on the health-care cost issue. Fat is only targeted because it’s highly visible. Which brings me to my next point:

2. Do you know this person? Well, then, why the hell are you judging?

This is kind of just an expansion on no. 1. The reason why it’s definitely not okay to judge somebody based on their size is that you have no effing idea what their situation is. Maybe they’re like me, a fat person who diets obsessively and simply has a damned hard time getting/keeping weight off, with or without extreme measures.

A sidenote: the average bulimic isn’t skinny. People view people with eating disorders, at least anorexics, as martyrs to the cause of Thin. In reality, unless a bulimic purges with dangerously high frequency, or is essentially an Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (EDNOS) and practices extreme calorie restriction outside of purging behavior, we’re going to be “average” to overweight. Most of us only purge if and when we binge, and try like hell to eat a controlled diet outside of that. (The dieting leads to hunger and desperation, which leads to binges, but that’s another post.) Also, purging isn’t perfect, and doesn’t always “get everything out.” If bulimics throw up EVERYTHING, all the time, they die. So that chubby girl who seems so happy and okay with eating three plates at the buffet may just be tossing her cookies afterwards. Don’t judge.

Back on point: Even if they don’t diet obsessively, it’s still not okay to judge people. Maybe they have an FA spouse/partner. Maybe they’re more mentally well-balanced just eating and not worrying about it than freaking out over a cookie. Maybe they have one of those Gland Problems. Perhaps they had gallbladder issues due to yo-yo dieting, and decided to stop. Perhaps they eat sensibly and exercise, but still don’t fit your mold (while that skinny dude over there sits on the couch and eats his bag of cheeseburgers, because he’s genetically lucky). You don’t know. You have no right to so much as comment until you do.

3. Some fat-haters are really just self-haters trying to get some validation.

People love feeling better than other people. Truly. If you’ve never waited tables or worked any type of customer service, pick up a second gig for a week or two and see how people revel in the opportunity to be assholes just because they know you have to either take it, or not get paid. A lot of fat-haters are like this: it’s an easy opportunity to feel superior to someone. Others, though—especially on the internets and sites like this one—are engaging in projected thinspiration. If you see a girl on a blog putting up post after post with those charming little slogans about how nothing tastes better than thin feels, wistful musings on how much better life would be with a full inch of clearance between one’s thighs, and pictures of scales, models, or herself pinching some tiny piece of flesh over her exposed rib while sobbing, this person does not actually hate you. This person hates themselves. They are trying to rationalize and justify their self-hate by constantly comparing themselves to others, and by getting validation from other people—anyone—who agree with them. Hell, it doesn’t even matter if the people agree with them, as long as they can somehow skew their words to their own mental gain. Eating disorders are matters of obsession, and the need to constantly assert, validate, and somehow justify one’s skewed beliefs is a part of that. That’s why thinspiration is so popular—not just for “motivation,” but as external “proof” that the disorder is justified, as there are so many women out there doing a better job of being beautiful, lovable, and As They Should Be.

theinbetweenie: I love this, but there are cute bras that come...

Sun, 26 Jun 2011 20:34:22 -0400

theinbetweenie:

I love this, but there are cute bras that come in DD sizes. In fact, cute bras exist in all but the most unusual sizes. But they’re usually a. not comfortable, and b. not affordable, especially once you get past an F cup.

I spent so long trying to find cute bras in a D cup that were both functional and comfortable… They ARE getting better, though. Although one thing that kills me is how many bras above a C cup are “minimizers”—women pine (and pay!) for bigguns, then those of us who have ‘em are supposed to want to smash them down. Eff that, I get the ones with “gentle lift” and play them the hell up.

notblueatall: Let’s all start talking to our friends and...

Wed, 15 Jun 2011 00:27:15 -0400

notblueatall:

Let’s all start talking to our friends and neighbors about this. If we’re really honest and present it without insults and slurs, we’ll be surprised at just how many feel the exact same way: The rich run and rob us of our country and freedoms! If we stick together we can fight back!

She's a button! A chubby little button.

Thu, 09 Jun 2011 01:44:13 -0400

If you love Food Network (or like it, or whatever) pay attention to the Next Food Network Star for a sec. I know, it’s got the requisite competitive-reality-show-annoying-BS, however:

It also has a woman named Orchid. She does Filipino/Southern U.S. fusion cuisine on THE ONLY FAT PERSON ON A SHOW ABOUT COOKING (I’m sorry, maybe it’s an abnormal number of strangely high metabolisms on my teevee, but I have a hard time questioning whether or not these people actually eat their own food), and she’s FABULOUS.

The woman is beautiful, she can cook, AND, despite being fat, she’s also getting the most kudos from the judges for both her food and her adorable*, charismatic on-camera presence. I realize that this would probably go oh-so-differently in a show not about food, but the woman kind of became my hero for a minute.

*I know that “adorable” is a somewhat annoying diminutive, but she’s quite short and chubby-cheeked and brings out my Italian-grandma cheek-pinching urges. It’s in my blood. I can’t help it.

Ruminating

Thu, 09 Jun 2011 01:32:05 -0400

Verb. Means both “mulling something over” and “re-eating,” in the form of cows and cud.

So I realized today that a thought process that I’ve had for a really long time is wrong. I’ve been telling myself for years that “contrary to misconception, despite lapses and bouts of binging and purging, bulimics (read: me) spend most of their time trying desperately to eat normally.”

The truth actually reads: “contrary to misconception, despite lapses and bouts of binging and purging, bulimics (read: me) spend most of their time trying desperately to eat as they perceive a thin, supposedly average person would, according to media standards and widespread stereotypes.”

There. Fixed it.

Working on reversing my internalized arbitrary, superficial cultural standards and pressures: win.

WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT ON YOUR PLANET?

Sun, 05 Jun 2011 11:31:09 -0400

France. I’ve always loved the French culture, art, and (for the most part) people—plus I speak a tiny bit of the language.

the -ism that isn't

Wed, 01 Jun 2011 01:09:00 -0400

I really wish that they’d come out with more conclusive information on how eating disorders—specifically, compulsive overeating and bulimia—resemble addiction. I don’t know to what extent they do in the brain, but they definitely do in behavior/feeling.

(Incidentally, as I’ve mentioned before, compulsive overeating and bulimia are the true twins in the ED world, as opposed to anorexia and bulimia. The only salient difference is, natch, the purging aspect. Different thing going on with anorexia altogether, just a shared desired result.)

I know that they’ve come out with studies on how sugars and whatnot release endorphins similar to heroin, but I haven’t really seen the deductive leap made in Science that maybe food can act as an addictive substance—and, hence, that maybe weight isn’t all just about “having self-control.”

The bitch, of course, is that we’re evolved to want as much food as possible. To suddenly, within the past few decades, expect our evolution to do an about-face in order to keep up with the fashion trends is ridiculous.

I don’t want people to pity the fat ones of this world, I just want people to realize that it’s not a goddamn character flaw.

Photo

Wed, 01 Jun 2011 01:02:25 -0400

persisting: sugarcreamdeath: the-milk-eyed-mender: ver2go: Th...

Wed, 01 Jun 2011 01:01:53 -0400

persisting:

sugarcreamdeath:

the-milk-eyed-mender:

ver2go:

The chief Raoni cries when he learns that brazilian president Dilma released the beginning of construction of the hydroelectric plant of Belo Monte, even after tens of thousands of letters and emails addressed to her and which were ignored as the more than 600 000 signatures. That is, the death sentence of the peoples of Great Bend of the Xingu river is enacted. Belo Monte will inundate at least 400,000 hectares of forest, an area bigger than the Panama Canal, thus expelling 40,000 indigenous and local populations and destroying habitat valuable for many species - all to produce electricity at a high social, economic and environmental cost, which could easily be generated with greater investments in energy efficiency.

It was brought to my attention that there is a petition we all can sign to help support these indigenous people and the Amazon. Please take a second to check it out below or comparable petitions that are available. Thank you.

http://amazonwatch.org/take-action/stop-the-belo-monte-monster-dam

(.;;;___;;; ) please consider taking the moment to reblob and sign

God this breaks my heart. I cant believe anyone would do this. signing and reblogging

Please reblog.

And it will happen with barely a whisper to the first world.